Why James Shouldn't Be So Good at Blocking and Silencing Spells
by Quillcox
Summary: The Potters and the Weasleys (Molly, Arthur, Harry, Ginny and kids, Ron, Hermione and kids) are having dinner. When Albus spends the night with the girls, James and Hugo manage to have sex. But James is way too good at blocking and silencing spells. When morning comes, everyone's in for a surprise. For some people, two surprises. Or is it three...? Also posted on AO3.


**Also posted on AO3. Same name, same author. Disclaimer: I only own what you don't recognize.**

* * *

"James, could you put plates out for everyone?" Molly Weasley's voice floated throughout the Burrow, reaching the boy in question just as he was about to finish a game of chess with a good checkmate against his brother.

"Checkmate," James said, smirking at Albus. "For the-"

"For the fifteenth time in a row. I know," The younger deadpanned.

"James?"

"Coming, Gran!" James called, rolling his eyes. Albus started to snicker.

"Albus, I need you to set the silverware!" It was James' turn to snicker. Albus grumbled. The brothers got up and walked into the kitchen, where Molly was waiting, levitating plates on one side, and multiple forks, spoons, knives, and napkins in the other. The boys relieved their grandmother of her burden and she turned to finish cooking, while they walked into the dining room to set everything.

"I honestly don't see what all the fuss is about," Albus muttered so no one but his older brother would hear him. "We didn't get anything like this when we graduated Hogwarts." James sighed.

"Hugo and Lily are the last of us to graduate. Gran decided to have a giant feast, mainly for them, but also for all of us, as a late graduation meal." Albus humphed and continued setting the table. When they finished, they popped into the kitchen, let Molly know they were finished, and ran outside to view the mini Quidditch match that was happening before dinner.

"It's about time you two showed up!" Lily shouted from above. "We've been doing nothing for the past fifteen minutes. Hugo's team needs a seeker, and my team needs a chaser!"

"Then it's a good thing we can fulfill those requirements, isn't it?" Albus shouted back.

"Shut it!" Lily called. James and Albus grabbed their broomsticks and flew up to join them.

* * *

"Here you go, you two," Molly said, placing Lily and Hugo at the heads of the table.

"Thanks, Gran." Lily said.

"Yeah, thanks." Hugo agreed.

"Well, it's not every day someone graduates Hogwarts." she said. "It's not like I could celebrate this with your father, Hugo."

"Mum!" Ron said indignantly. "I was helping Harry track down Horcruxes so we could defeat Voldemort!"

"Oh, I know, dearie, I know," she replied. She waved her wand and food started to float in from the kitchen, settling itself on the table. There was just enough room for everyone and everything. It wasn't the most comfortable of arrangements, but it worked. Barely. "Well, what are you waiting for? Dig in!" Molly said.

Everyone started to heap their plates with gusto. Everyone loved Molly Weasley's cooking. It was essentially heaven for them. The elder Weasleys were at the heads of the table. The five Potters were on the right side, and the younger Weasleys were on the left side. James quickly filled his mouth with mashed potatoes and gravy with peas on top. That was his favorite part of his grandmother's chicken meal. It consisted of chicken, which was placed in a container with raw egg. Then the chicken breast was put into a Ziploc bag with flour inside, and was shaken up so the flour stuck to the chicken. The floured chicken would then be put into the oven. While the chicken was cooking, mashed potatoes would be made, the cranberry sauce brought out, the peas brought out, and the gravy started. After the chicken was taken out of the oven, it would get placed on a serving platter, the mashed potatoes into a bowl, the peas into a bowl, the cranberry sauce onto a plate, and the gravy into a gravy boat.* And as it was a special occasion - everyone has now graduated from Hogwarts - there was Butterbeer.

"Gran, this is awesome!" Albus said through his mouthful of chicken. Molly smiled down the table at him.

"Albus, don't talk with your mouth full," his mother reprimanded him. Albus swallowed his chicken.

"Sorry, Mum," he said. James rolled his eyes and continued to eat as much as he could as fast as he could.

"James…" his father started with a warning tone.

"Ish sho goo', 'ad!" he replied, albeit with difficulty. His mother gave him The Mom Look. James looked apologetic and started to eat much slower. Lily smirked through her mouthful. She's not doing anything wrong. And naturally, James observed, his cousins were being perfect little angels, taking small, delicate bites. Just to make them look bad. James is sure of it. He is so going to punish Hugo later for that. Hugo caught James' eye a moment later and gave a sexy grin. James' heart did a backflip and his brain went uh-oh. The younger put a forkful of mashed potatoes into his mouth and slowly pulled the fork out, smirking when it left his mouth with an almost inaudible pop. The sound went straight to James' penis. He grimaced as he felt himself growing hard, and tried to shift unobtrusively so no one would notice. He was definitely going to kill Hugo tonight.

"Everything all right there, James?" Hugo asked, apparently concerned. Underneath, though, James could clearly see the laughter and cheekiness on his face. All conversation stopped as everyone looked at him. The twenty year old raised his eyebrows.

"Perfectly fine, Hugo, why?"

"You were squirming in your seat," the smirking seventeen year old said. "Just making sure everything's all good."

"Well, I thank you for your concern." James said. "Everything is perfectly fine." He pointedly glared at everyone, and the buzz of conversation started up again. He continued to look at Hugo, and the next time the boy looked up, James gave him the dirtiest look he could muster while enjoying his favorite meal of all time. Hugo rolled his eyes, but did start to squirm a little. James grinned and resumed eating.

* * *

"Right. Boys, girls, bed!" Ron said, clapping his hands. The three Potters and the two Weasleys looked at him, scandalized.

"Uncle Ron, it's not even midnight yet!" Lily said.

"Dad, come one!" Hugo argued. "Lily and I just graduated Hogwarts! Can't we have a late night?"

"We're going to bed too, dear," Hermione said.

"So?" Rose asked. "You people are old!" Hermione raised her eyebrows. "What? It's true!"

"Bed," Ginny said, giving all five The I'm In Charge Do Not Even _Think_ About Arguing look.

"Fine," they grumbled, filing out through the doorway.

"G'night Mom, Dad, Uncle Ron, Aunt Hermione, Gran, and Gramps," James, Albus, and Lily said.

"G'night Mom, Dad, Uncle Harry, Auntie Ginny, Gran, and Gramps," Rose and Hugo said.

"Good night, children," the older adults chorused.

"Albus, did you ask?" Lily hissed from the stairs (completely audible to the adults, naturally. Lily is not very good at being sneaky.).

"Oh yeah!" he said, bounding back into the room. Everyone looked at him expectantly. "The girls want to give me a makeover. It's one of those willingly or not things for them." The four parents shook their heads, knowing that Rose and Lily really would do it no matter what.

"You'll be spending the night in their room?" Harry asked, trying to clarify what his middle child was asking. Albus nodded. Harry glanced at his wife, brother-in-law, and sister-in-law. They all shrugged and nodded, knowing it was probably better to allow it then for them to say no and it still happen. "Go for it." Harry said.

"Thanks, Dad!" he said, running out of the room.

"How bad is it going to be?" Arthur asked, as soon as the boy was out of earshot. All four grimaced.

"Really bad," Ron said. "'Mione, you'll probably want to start readying yourself for reversal and neutralization spells." Hermione grimaced.

"Undoing things that my daughter and Ginny's daughter did? Molly, I might need a hand." The elder woman smiled.

"Of course, hon. Anything you need."

"Good!" Arthur said, clapping his hands. "Who's up for a game?" The other five grownups quickly gathered around the table as Arthur conjured Chess up. "Teams and competition?" Everyone nodded and moved closer to their respective partner.

"Knight to C-3."

* * *

"Albus, would you hurry up!" Lily shouted. Albus rolled his eyes.

"Lils, I'm getting everything I need for tonight!"

"What could you possibly need? All that's necessary are your pajamas!"

"I want my notebook. It's got everything I've ever wanted to look like. With drawings. You two can choose the best one!"

"Albus! Now!" Rose yelled.

"Coming!" he called, waving his wand. His pajamas and notebook flew over to him, and he exited the room, leaving James and Hugo alone.

"Finally," James said, flicking his wand at the door. It clicked softly as it locked.

"Obfirmo. Silencio. Colloportus." He added, for good measure. James had just enough time to toss his wand onto his bedside table before Hugo barreled into him, melding their lips together, kissing the living daylights out of him. The elder responded enthusiastically, ensuring Hugo wouldn't stop. They broke apart, breathing heavily. James stared at Hugo's lips, mesmerized by the swollen, pink beauty. The younger stared back, taking in every millimeter of his cousin's face. James then bolted into action, pulling his shirt off, which was quickly joined by his belt, shorts, and underwear. Hugo gave his boyfriend a mischievous grin as he also got rid of his shirt, belt, and socks. He stood in the middle of the room, watching James.

"You're going to make me take off your pants?" James demanded. Hugo nodded. The Potter boy sighed and jumped across the room, yanking the red head's pants off. His eyes widened as he saw what was underneath. Or rather, what wasn't underneath.

"You like?" Hugo asked.

"You went commando." James stated. Hugo smirked.

"Well, that's what happens when I run out of underwear to steal from my sexy boyfriend. I can only take so many each time I see you, you know." James' mouth dropped to the floor.

"You're the one who's been taking my underwear? You took my favorite pair!" Hugo grinned.

"I know, Jamie. I know. Now, are you going to fill me up or are we going to talk through the night?" An animalistic growl erupted from deep within James as he claimed Hugo's lips with a searing kiss, forcing both boys onto the bed. As they kissed, their erections rubbed together.

"Oh my god, James," Hugo gasped through the kiss, the pleasure remarkably intense. James smiled, not wanting to break the kiss for anything. He fumbled around, looking for his wand. He grasped his fingers around it and waved it in the general direction of the lube he brought with him. It shot into his hand like a bullet and he threw his wand back on the table and pulled away from Hugo.

"Ready?" James asked. Hugo nodded, the lust in his eyes almost completely overpowering James' self control. It was all James could do to not fuck his cousin then and there. He squeezed the bottle; a thick glob of the gel inside oozed out and landed on James' outstretched hand. He quickly applied it liberally to himself, before squeezing another glob onto his index finger. He tossed the used bottle onto the floor and spread the gel onto his middle and ring finger. He slid his index finger into Hugo. Hugo gasped as the intrusion rubbed against his walls, and James groaned as he felt the tightness and the heat envelope his finger.

"I forgot how good you feel," James said, relaxing in the pleasurable sensation.  
"Well, if you keep reminiscing about it, I'm going to blast you!" Hugo said, extremely annoyed. "You've got to add more fingers and move! NOW!" James grinned, thrilled that he got his normally pleasant and calm boyfriend completely annoyed and flustered. But then again, it happened every time they had sex. He quickly added another finger, scissoring Hugo as quickly and as painlessly as possible.

"Better?" The elder Potter son asked. Hugo growled. A third finger was added and the growl turned into a sigh. The younger turned his head to face the other.

"Fuck me." James' heart missed a beat. Hugo's face was deadly serious, lust pooling in his eyes. The brown eyes flashed.

"Certainly." He removed his fingers, becoming harder as he heard Hugo's moans of want and need. He positioned himself in front of Hugo's entrance and thrust in, wishing to get Hugo's pain done and dealt with as fast as possible. The boy in question sucked in a breath, the sharp pain not enjoyable. "It's all right, Hugo. Everything's all right."

"Shut up and let me adjust," Hugo spat, ignoring the pain as much as possible. James raised his eyebrows, but completely unsurprised. His cousin became completely wild during sex. If he didn't hear at least one relatively insulting or rude comment during sex, he knew something was up.

"You good?" James asked. Hugo nodded.

"Yes. Now fuck me before I kill you," James grinned and started to move in and out of the redhead, gradually building up speed.

"Hugo!" The elder gasped. The tightness and the sounds Hugo was making almost drove James over the edge.

"James...gonna...cum!" The younger boy grunted, overcome by pleasure. He had missed James. Since he had just graduated from Hogwarts, they couldn't see each other nearly as often as they would have preferred.

"Go on, Hugo. Cum for me, you sweet, sweet boy," Hugo gasped and came, white strands of cum being shot out of his penis and landing on his neck, chest, and James' arms. As Hugo's walls contracted around James, the friction became to much. He shouted and came, hard. His cum filled Hugo up to the brim and then some. The redheaded child groaned in ecstasy as he felt himself being filled. James sighed and pulled his flaccid penis out of his boyfriend, wrapping his arms around the younger. Hugo sighed as well and snuggled in close, pulling James in for a quick kiss before falling asleep. James grinned, and then joined Hugo in unconsciousness.

* * *

Albus sighed as he turned away from his bedroom door. He was trying to get in so he could get ready for the day (as it was nearly nine), but it was locked. And nothing he tried worked. He was also unaware that the girls had given him a green mohawk and changed his eyebrow color to red. They were fully aware that they clashed horribly. It's not like it's even close to Christmas time, anyway.

"Aunt Hermione?" Albus asked. Hermione looked at him, coffee in hand, eyebrow raised.

"What's up, Albus?" She answered.

"Could you unlock me door for me? I tried to get in to get dressed, but the door is sealed, and I couldn't unlock it." Hermione raised both eyebrows now.

"You couldn't unlock it?" Albus shook his head. "All right, let's go," she said, walking upstairs. Hermione took out her wand and pointed it at the door. "Alohamora." Nothing happened.

"I tried that," Albus said.

"Thank you, Albus," Hermione said, concentrating. "Finite!" Still, nothing. "Finite Incantatem!" At this point, Hermione was getting mad. "Albus, go get your parents, would you? I need to get my husband and we'll bombard this door with spells until we can get it."

"OK," Albus said, rushing away. Hermione heaved an angry sigh and headed off to find Ron. He was in the kitchen, just about to start into his breakfast.

"Ron, I need a hand." The aforementioned man gave a start at his wife's voice, looking up with apprehension on his face. "I can't unlock the boy's bedroom door." Ron raised his eyebrows. Hermione not able to do something magical almost never occurred.

"Can I at least start my-" he was cut off as his wife gave him The Look. "Coming, dear." He got up and they walked up to the bedroom, where Albus was waiting with his parents.

"Let's try and not destroy the door," Harry said. The other three nodded.

"Agreed," Ginny stated. "Let's do this." The middle generation of people at the Burrow raised their wands.

"Three," Hermione said.

"Two," came from Ginny.

"One," Ron vocalized.

"Fire," Harry finished. They started mumbling spells beneath their breath, but they all had no affect whatsoever. They were either deflected or absorbed. Rose, Albus, and Lily joined the mix, firing every single opening and negating spell they had ever come across.

"Right. This isn't working," Albus said, holding up his hands to signal the others to stop.

"How are the spells this powerful?" Hermione asked. "This isn't natural."

"We'll have to destroy the door," Harry said. "The spells will break that way, and we can fix the door afterwards." He glanced at his wife, checking for agreement. She nodded.

"Reducto!"

"Bombarda Maxima!"

"Confringo!"

"Expulso!"

The door exploded. Shards of wood flew everywhere, accompanied by both doorknobs a a little bit of the wall. Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Ginny charged in, wands at the ready, but were not prepared for the sight that awaited them. James and Hugo were lying in bed together, obviously naked. The air smelled heavily of sex. Albus, Lily, and Rose's jaws fell open, and the older adults just stared.

"Everyone out!" Hermione whispered. Harry and Ron looked at her like she was insane. "We'll talk to them when they get up. Right now, let them sleep."

"I don't believe it," Ron muttered. "Are y'sure Hugo didn't have a nightmare?" Ginny looked at him.

"Has your sense of smell left you?" She demanded. Ron sniffed.

"Bloody hell!" He exclaimed. "They're having sex!"

"Thank you, Captain Obvious," Everyone stared at James, who had groggily turned his head. "Now, if you would be so kind as to fix the door and leave, I'd appreciate it. Hugo's sleeping." He turned his head back towards the mess of red hair and closed his eyes. Harry looked as though he wanted to say something, but a glare from Ginny shut him up. Hermione waved her wand at the pieces of the door, which flew together, as did the wall. Everyone left the room, looking behind them at the two boys cuddled up in bed.

"You prat, James. I have half a mind to kill you for not telling me," Albus said, right before he left. He heard a derisive snort from behind him.

"First of all, what happened to your hair? And eyebrows?" Albus gulped and looked for a mirror. He was _so_ going to kill his sister and cousin later. "And second of all, at least I'm the only one who knows you're being shagged by Scorpius Malfoy." James finished, a little louder than necessary.

"WHAT?" Harry and Ron's shout echoed throughout the Burrow. Albus' face turned beet red and he Disapparated. James felt Hugo's body shake in silent laughter, and he stole a quick kiss before their fathers burst in.

"Dad, go away!" The boys simultaneously moaned.

"Serious talk when he gets back?" Ron asked, ignoring his son and nephew.

"Oh, yeah."

"So you're going to deal with Albus first?" James asked. Both men looked at each other, and then him.

"Yes." They left the room, going to tell everyone else. Hugo looked at James, adoration in his eyes.

"I love you," he said. James looked at him, knowing he wanted to spend every second of his life beside the boy.

"I love you too."

* * *

***My dad made this exact meal for my siblings and I when we were younger. It was (still is, actually) my favorite meal of all time.**

* * *

**I hope you liked this. If you review, I might write a sequel revolving around Albus and Scorpius (directly after these events) and give you a shout out...**


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